Philosophy | Ritual | Techinque | Inspiration | Links

Philosophy:

Sex means a lot of things: biological reproductive organs, the complex social constructs around gender, hot wet deliciousness, abuse, self-worth, shame, ritual, health and disease, love, politics. There is so much to say about each of these things.

First, here's my Discordian view on gender.

Gender is not a binary system. Discordians spend so much of their time breaking out of false dualities - order/disorder, good/bad, creative/destructive - that it seems ridiculous not to add male/female into our tradition of heresy.

What makes a man? Surely it is not his penis, because a man wounded between the legs is a man still. Surely it is not his swagger, because shy and gentle men are still men. What makes a woman? Surely it is not her womb or her breasts, because many women live without both these organs due to the wonders of modern medicine, and yet they still live as women. Surely it is not her grace, because arrogant and even crude women are women still.

The preceeding is just the beginning. If gender lives in our identities, why should we assume it conforms to any biological specifications?

Consider that all the people you know who claim to be men almost certainly do not express their masculinity the same way, the same for those who claim to be women. Consider that some of the women you know may express their gender more like some of the men you know than like other women in your acquaintance.

I propose a re-thinking of gender. Instead of a binary male/female switch, I propose instead considering gender as a spectrum. Not just one spectrum, either. Picture the equalizer on an expensive stero - gender is a series of slides and dials where each sets your position on a different scale. Gender constitutes a person's place between aggression and passivity, obsessive focus and multitasking, hot and cold, force and gentleness, angle and curve, sensate and intuitive ways of knowing, etc.

Just like the expensive stereo, gender has a couple of popular pre-sets. Even still, most people screw around with those dials and slides from time to time, and find the combination that works best. "Male" or "female" become shorthand for the pre-set archetype we feel closest to, but these are by no means standardized sets of traits. Some people are more comfortable in the middle, or outside of gendered archetypes altogether.

And now for the hot wet deliciousness....

There's a certain irony in the fact that one of the hottest sexual experiences is the breaking of taboo. Escalation of order equals imposition of chaos goes for social attitudes towards sexuality, too. The more society or government tries to shut down "deviant" practices, the more fun they become. And thank the goddess for that, because given the anti-sex attitudes of the current American government, we need the booby prize now more than ever.

On June 17th, 2006 I canonized Annie Sprinkle and thanked her for her contribution to the world. In fact, she can be thanked for most of the writing in this section.

You see, I've been trying to write about sex for Discordian.com for the last three years, since this incarnation of the site first went up. There's so much to say, and at the same time I often find myself just as confused as anyone else. In the last three years, I've had sex with men and I've had sex with women, I've taken and lost lovers, I've gotten married, I've openly seen other people. I've been there. And while I'd like to say I've been too busy having sex to write about it, I know that's not true. Really? I've been thinking.

I've been thinking that sex is one of the ways we can really break down the barriers we've put between ourselves. Most of the time, this is a deeply healing experience, a religious experience. When the gnostics spoke of the saint and the whore, they spoke of the same person. Most of us don't have the fearlessness and compassion to be either, and raw open hot wet scary scary scary sex is about remembering how to rip open the protective shell we grow and let someone see us at our most vulnerable.

So thank you, Annie Sprinkle. Thank you, Ducky DooLittle, Carol Queen, Pat Califa, and so many more that have worked for our sexual liberation and intensification.

Go forth and enjoy yourself, and let the ecastacy of connection lead you through the world orgasm and out into the warm sticky afterglow.

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Ritual:

P.B. Randolph's "Magica Sexualis" is a highly interesting approach to sex magic from the nineteenth century that uses a balanced heterosexual approach. Might be fun to tweak this one to work with same-gender couples. He was one of the forerunners of Crowley. Check out this biography

Spiral Nature is a great site run by a friend of mine, occultism with a Discordian bent. They have a sex section.

Phil Hine is a major figure in chaos magic(k), and has written extensively on sex magic(k).

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Technique:

Violet Blue is a sex educator, writer, creator of Open Source Sex. This site has erotica, tips on finding good porn, tips on giving good head to all genders, podcasts, and all sorts of other great stuff. Highly re-come-nded.

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Inspiration:

RAW on sex: Sexual Freedom, Why It Is Feared, Sex and the Mind-Expanding Drugs, The Future of Sex.

The Shadow Sacrament is an online journal dedicated to non-fiction and poetry that relates to the intersection of sex and spirituality. Submissions are solicited, and what's there is highly worth reading.

(Gender) Pirate/Ninja, a story to get your brain going in places it probably hasn't yet....

A friend of mine wrote a series of essays on sacred sex. Introduction, Praising the Feminine, Praising the Masculine, What is Sex Magick?, Transgengerism: Male to Female, Transgengerism: Female to Male, Union.

Literotica has hot, free, mostly well-written sex stories.

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Links:

If you go to only one site on this whole page, GO HERE. Lucky Mojo is an awesome site that sells voodoo supplies and other things, and has an excellent online library of information. Their sacred sex section (linked above) is EXCELLENT and comprehensive.

Michael's Trangender Page has some information and links on being a female to male trans man. Michael's Resources Page has a ton more excellent links.

I'm not sure WTF this is, but it's interesting. Porn, conspiracy theories, weird news, ... equals profit?

Queers on Wheels is an organization for GLBT people with a physical disAbility. Good resource if you find yourself in this situation or caring about someone who is, or just want to try on a different perspective for a while.

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