I really did think long and hard about what discordia is to me. I have reached several conclusions, Discordia is the force that gives me courage. Without discordia I would not be the girl I am today, I proudly boast my hairiness, my dorkiness, and stunning fashion sense with discordia at my side. Is this shallow of me? I frankly don't care, I am me. So how does discordia relate to all this? I'm not entirely certain, but in the days before, I was a mindless drone to society, I wore what 'they' considered cool, I listened to the music, I wanted to be 'cool', discordia is the force that lets me know I will be loved by my fellow freaks, even if I choose to dress in retro eighties clothes and refuse to shave my legs.

Discordia is so much more to me then an excuse for my lifestyle, I'm a discoridian, so now what?

Well now is the time when I do not fear other's reactions to my words and actions, now is the time I say what I want when I want too, I'm not a prankster, it's just never been me, I think that discordia is power to be me, uncensored by what I should be thinking as a good little girl, it is not an excuse to have sex, use drugs, drink, etc. as I, as an individual, choose not to do such things, this is my own decision, not influenced by society, but by choices I was able to make unhindered.

I do not rebel against society, what I am, and what I do is not a rebellion, it is simply a declaration of self, I am not a rebel, I do not seek conflict, but I will not alter myself for the sake of others, but I will always change for my own sake.

I have no animosity towards those who choose to follow the path laid out by society, we all must make choices, I made mine, let them make theirs.

I do not claim false madness, I do not worship and seek to cause chaos, discordia is about the balance of chaos and order, I hope to represent the creative side of both disciplines, I know I don't, but that's besides the point.

I do not need you to understand my discordia, I do not need you to understand me, I do not need anyone to understand me, but I do need someone to stand by me, I can not be brave alone.

Discordia is the force that gives me strength, it has given me more then that though, I have risen above society, I have found happiness, I have found contentment, I no longer struggle to be that which I am not, I have found selfesteem I did not know I had.